In Memory of John

John Charles Utting was born on 05 January 1997, the eldest of three. He grew up in Horsforth alongside his sister Elizabeth and brother Robert. A young man with everything ahead of him — a new job he was proud of, a house he had just bought, family who loved him and friends who thought the world of him. He was a good friend to all.

John was a smiler. Photographs from every stage of his life appear to show him happy, content and at ease with life. A cheeky laugh, a generous friend, the son who laughed at his dad's jokes and had begun to master them himself.

And yet, behind it all, unknown to his family and friends, he was struggling.

John died by suicide on 05 August 2022, aged 25.

We are holding this ball to mark what would have been his 30th birthday year, and 5th year of his death. We are raising money for Mind because every pound raised helps someone, somewhere, feel less alone in the darkness. And we are talking about what happened, because the silence has to end.

If you knew John, come to remember him. If you didn't, come and help us honour his memory in aid of a cause that could not matter more. We can't bring John back. But together, we can make sure fewer families have to sit where we have sat.

If you are reading this and you are struggling yourself, please talk to someone. Samaritans are there day and night, every day of the year, on 116 123. Whatever you are carrying, you do not have to carry it alone.

And if you are grieving someone of your own, Mind have information and advice on coping with loss at mind.org.uk/bereavementsupport.

"A hole in our hearts that will never be replaced, a pain so deep that will never be erased. A much-loved son, brother and the greatest of friends. No one should ever walk alone."

— from a message John's friends left for the family